


Not like the others/just like the others

by Nary



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Backstory, Bonding, Developing Relationship, F/M, Galra Empire, Holding Hands, blade of marmora
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-30
Updated: 2017-11-30
Packaged: 2019-02-05 13:38:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,797
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12795723
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nary/pseuds/Nary
Summary: "You know nothing about me," Kolivan said, bristling a little although he tried to keep his tone calm and even.  "Our goals merely happen to be aligned."Allura looked for a moment like she might protest, but instead she sighed and nodded.  "You're right," she admitted.  "I don't know anything about you.  But... I would like to learn."





	Not like the others/just like the others

The Blade of Marmora training session was just wrapping up - Keith showed promise, although Kolivan was concerned about his tendency toward rash decisions in combat. He stopped him as they were getting ready to leave, prepared to give him a stern talk about how he needed to control himself and not run headlong into every opponent he faced, when he realized Princess Allura was standing near the door, watching them. 

"What is it?" Keith said, removing his mask and clearly expecting a lecture. 

Kolivan took his mask off as well. "You did well," he told him. "Keep up the good work."

Keith looked surprised at the praise, but nodded and headed off, breezing by the princess on his way out. Kolivan waited to see if she would follow - perhaps she had come to speak to the paladin - but she stayed back, waiting for the others to leave as well.

"What do you want?" he asked her at last. His words sounded brusque even to his own ears, but it was no secret that the Altean princess disliked having Galra on her ship. She had barely spoken to him since his arrival.

To his surprise, she looked down, blushing. "I owe you and your fellow Blades an apology, Kolivan."

That was, if not quite the last thing he was expecting, then very close to it. "You owe me nothing," he told her.

"I have been unfair to you," she pressed on, looking up to meet his eyes. "You may be Galra, but you are not like the others. I know we're on the same side in this war."

"You know nothing about me," Kolivan said, bristling a little although he tried to keep his tone calm and even. "Our goals merely happen to be aligned."

Allura looked for a moment like she might protest, but instead she sighed and nodded. "You're right," she admitted. "I don't know anything about you. But... I would like to learn."

Kolivan's first instinct was to walk away, dismissive of her polite platitudes. But he reminded himself that her family, almost her entire species, had been wiped out by Zarkon's forces. It had to take courage for her to even be speaking to him right now, let alone trying to build bridges between them. "Very well," he said. "We can continue this conversation after I've had a chance to clean up. I probably stink of sweat."

"I don't mind the smell," Allura said, then looked as though she immediately regretted it. "But of course, we can speak later." She turned around and walked away briskly, leaving Kolivan wondering what her problem was. Shrugging to himself, he headed off to bathe. 

***

Allura caught up with him the following day. It seemed like an accident at first, but Kolivan had never before seen her in the section of the castle the Blades were using as their quarters when they were on site. For the princess to just happen to run into him in the corridor was certainly unusual. Even more unusual was her request that he join her for some nunvill. Truth be told, he didn't particularly care for the warm beverage preferred by the Alteans, but he agreed nevertheless.

The princess led him through the castle's maze-like corridors, up a winding stairway, and finally opened a door, revealing a smaller version of the castle's lounge, a circular seating area only big enough for perhaps two or three individuals, with a low table and soft cushions. Kolivan looked around in bemusement. "I was unaware this chamber was even here."

Allura smiled. "The Castle of Lions has many secrets - including rooms meant for more private conversations. They don't tend to see as much use these days, of course," she added a bit wistfully. Kolivan tried to imagine what the castle must have been like in her youth - no doubt much busier, full of courtiers and staff and technicians. Even now that it wasn't just her and Coran and the paladins any longer, it must still seem very empty to Allura.

She gestured for him to have a seat, while she went to a panel in the wall and poured two mugs of nunvill. Kolivan accepted the drink politely, taking a sip and trying not to make a face. Allura seated herself across from him, her delicate hands wrapped around the warm mug. "I feel as though I offended you yesterday. If that was the case, I apologize."

Kolivan shook his head. "I was not offended," he told her. "But you are mistaken if you think I'm different than other Galra."

Allura's brow furrowed, confused. "But you lead a rebellion against them."

"No," he said. "I lead a rebellion against Zarkon. There are Galra who do not hold to his beliefs, even within the Empire."

"Like Thace and Ulaz?" 

Kolivan was touched that she remembered their names - despite her evident aversion to his people, she still respected the bravery of those who had fallen. "Yes," he said, "like them, and others. And then there are many Galra, ordinary citizens, who think little of Zarkon in their daily lives. They are no more responsible for the atrocities committed in the name of the Empire than... than those mice are responsible for flying the castle ship," he said, observing the group of mice perched a respectful distance away and watching attentively.

Allura smiled slightly at that. "Oh, I think in a pinch the mice could do quite well! But I take your point." She hesitated, clearly uncertain how or whether to proceed. 

"Something is ruffling your fur," he said. "What is it?"

"My... fur?" Allura looked puzzled. "Oh, you mean something's bothering me? I suppose so. I was just wondering about how you came to join the Blade of Marmora... if you are willing to tell me, that is," she added almost shyly.

Momentarily surprised, Kolivan nodded. "I was an officer in the Galra Empire," he told her, his voice becoming quieter. It wasn't a story he told often. He suspected even most of the other Blades didn't know the details. "I was stationed on Thalruv for my first command. It was an agricultural planet - the inhabitants were mostly farmers, craftspeople, and traders, but with little advanced technology. They fell rapidly to the Empire, and the planet was turned over to full-scale food production to support the troops. They were the first people I'd seen who weren't Galra. I was young and foolish," he admitted, still feeling ashamed even after so long. "Our orders were to take seventy percent of their crops, leaving them only a little less than a third of what they'd formerly had on which to survive. Eventually, that wasn't enough."

"No, I imagine it wouldn't be," Allura said, aghast. "How would they be able to live on so little?"

"You misunderstand," Kolivan told her grimly. "It wasn't enough for the Empire. The proportion we took from them grew and grew. I watched as they gradually starved. Even when they were so weak that they could barely walk to the fields of lorma-vine, we received orders to increase crop production. It was terrible."

"What happened?" Allura leaned forward, listening intently.

"I wish I could say that eventually I couldn't bear the cruelty anymore," Kolivan said, looking down at his still-full cup of nunvill. "That I refused my orders and liberated the Thalruvians. But the truth is, I was punished for failing to meet the assigned quintently goals in my district. I grew resentful of the Empire for expecting the impossible, but also of the Thalruvians for not working harder. In my mind, it was everyone's fault but my own. As I said before, I was young and foolish." 

He took a deep breath before continuing. "I tried to force them to work more efficiently. They had certain rituals that they believed they needed to perform before harvesting the lorma, in order to pay their respects to the spirits of the plants. I forbade this practice as a pointless waste of time. It would only have saved a few ticks for each plant cut, but those ticks added up, I decided. The Thalruvians refused. And they fought back. I was injured by one of the blades they used to cut the vines," he said, gesturing to the scar that marred his face. 

Allura winced. "You could have been killed."

“Yes," he agreed. "I could have been, but instead I ran. I abandoned my post, behaved like a coward, but I survived. I knew then that I could never return to the Empire. I would be executed for desertion if I did. I didn't know where else to go. I'd always been taught there was nothing outside the Empire but savages and barren wastelands."

"Hmph." Allura sniffed, affronted. 

"Obviously I later learned that wasn't the case," Kolivan told her. "But I was fortunate - before I could get myself into further trouble, I was found by a member of the Blade of Marmora. And still more fortunately, she did not immediately kill me," he added with the barest hint of a smile.

"She?" Allura asked, with an odd curiosity. Perhaps she had been unaware that there were female Blades. 

"Yes," said Kolivan. "Zobara was one of the Blade's greatest pilots - and she had the fluffiest, softest ears I had ever seen." When Allura smiled, he added, "I did mention that I was very young."

"I can tell she made a big impression on you," Allura said gently. 

"She was the first person to show me there were other paths I could take beyond unquestioningly serving the Empire. It was because of her that I began to see the atrocities I had participated in for what they were." Kolivan paused for a moment. "It was not possible for me to fix my errors, though. The Thalruvians' uprising was short-lived - many were put into the arena for their rebellion. Zobara gave me another chance. By joining the Blade of Marmora, I could work to prevent other planets from falling under Zarkon's rule, or aid those that already had. Since then, that is the goal I've devoted myself towards achieving."

Allura nodded. "But it still feels like it's not enough."

Kolivan glanced over at her in surprise. "Yes," he admitted, his voice low. "It is never enough."

The princess slid around the curved seat until she was beside him, and put her hand on his. It looked very small in comparison, and for a moment Kolivan felt large and ungainly next to her. "Thank you for trusting me enough to tell me this," she said. "I think I understand a little better now." She leaned against him, and they stayed that way for some time, more comfortable with one another than Kolivan would have thought was possible even a short while before.

**Author's Note:**

> This work is part of [VLD Tropes Fest](http://vldtropesfest.tumblr.com)
> 
> You can find me on Tumblr at [naryrising](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/naryrising) if you want to ask questions, make requests, or chat!


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